Lunar Adventures: exploring a little bit of everything
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New career dream, and at Taco Bell of all places
I was at the local haven for extremely average Tex-Mex, Taco Bell, when Mallory pointed out to me that the little freebie packets of hot sauce all have clever little witticisms on them.
For example:
- “Careful! I don’t do well under pressure.”
- “When I grow up, I want to be a waterbed.”
- “Hello.”
- “Hurry up! I’m burning up in here!”
I found this to be brilliant. My favorite is the waterbed one — if you look at the little packet, it really does look like a miniature waterbed.
At any rate, I want to be the guy that writes the clever little things on Taco Bell hot sauce packets. Of course, I wouldn’t continue with the status quo — I’d make some changes. For instance, all three of the types of hot sauce (mild, hot, really hot) have sayings picked from the same pool. So, both a mild packet or a hot packet had “Hurry up! I’m burning up in here!” on them. Really, that’s not appropriate for a mild packet. Those aren’t spicy at all. If I were in charge, there would be three pools of statements to draw from, so that any packet could want to grow up to be a waterbed but only really hot packets could have the burning up statement.
If not me, someone needs to make this happen.
Tue October 11th, 2005 2:42 pm
Filed under Life, Observations
7 comments
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How about “I taste best on extremely average Tex-Mex!” for one of your packets?
You might not want to point the Taco Bell ad execs to you blog, as they might bristle at your “extremely average Tex-Mex” comment, although, in truth, it was pretty generous.
Not gonna lie — I like the Taco Cabana much better. AND they’re open 24 hours. Taco Bell has two things going for it — it’s cheap and they’re all over the place. Taco Cabana loses points for having annoying commercials.
That reminds me — whatever happened to the Taco Bell chihuaha? He was annoying, but now that he’s gone, I kind of miss him.
Haha. Even yesterday, I realized I could totally see you as the new Taco Bell sauce packet slogan guy. But you have to prove you could hack it. Where are your contributions??
Taco Cabana…is that the one we’ve been to together a time or two? That wasn’t Bueno, was it?
Taco Bell might as well be open 24 hours; it’s open from 10:00 AM to 5:00 AM. Who the hell wants a taco at 7:30 in the morning?
What about Baja Fresh..pricey but good. My friends @ Art Squad have jobs you might like, they helped place Clint R. I just began writing for UT- no clever jingles though.
The Baja Fresh around here closed. I don’t know where there is another one.
Here are few new sauce packet slogans I think Taco Bell should try?
“…you can always blame the dog.”
“What the hell else are you going to eat at 2am when you’re half-sober?”
“…your toilet will thank you for it.”
“The perfect Hangover preventer!”
The Taco Bell geniuses probably do this just so us folks will talk about it and raise hell. Any publicity is good publicity…